The loss of a loved one makes every day a roller coaster of emotions whether up or down, good or bad. The Holidays bring a different kind of melancholy feeling of emptiness that can be difficult to maneuver this time of year. The first thing I learned in my loss was that everyone grieves differently, and however someone chooses to grieve they deserve love and support regardless.
Some find themselves angry at the world, some feel silence and emptiness, and others feel a sense of joy and honor for the person they lost. In 2022 it will have been 10 years without my mother. Every Birthday, Holiday, and non holiday since 2007 have been hard without her here. I don’t say this for sympathy, I say this because I understand. Losing a parent is a club I would never wish to be in, and while the emotions still come in waves, I try to be a strong version of myself while still letting myself feel to heal.
It is important to surround yourself with people you love, remember you are not alone. Whether you see a therapist, or spend time with your family, volunteer, or do a self care routine, make sure to protect your heart, space, and time. Do what you can with what you have. As for myself, and honoring my mom while she’s no longer here. I spend time with my sister and we bake cookies like my mom used to do. We still have our homemade eggroll Christmas tradition, and of course when I see a lawn gnome, I buy it. My mom collected lawn gnomes, she would order from a catalog and say, tell your father my friend sent this to me if he says anything . It really is the little things that bring a smile or a memory back. I saw this post on Facebook and I believe it sums up a bit of our feelings as we get older.
Do whatever you can to find joy this year. Always have hope and remember being present is one of the best presents of all. I hope you all have a blessed and fabulous holiday season.
Unapologetically Sam 